That Thin Line
Today is my Anniversary.
Each year on this day, I reflect back on my relationship with my husband Michael.
Each year on this day, I am always reminded of how much our God truly loves us!!
Mine and Michael's relationship was not originally built on the foundation of Faith.
We met on a blind date and we were inseparable ever since. It was moving along great and it was moving along quickly.
I knew that I loved him right from the start. He was kind and considerate. He loved me completely and even better, he loved my daughter Tara with his entire being. We thought that we had it all. This was great!!!
What we didn't have, was a relationship built on faith.
So what you say, What's the big deal?
I'll tell you........
Our relationship hit some major obstacles. I became pregnant and I also lost my job. Our perfect life was beginning to unravel........
We planned a wedding....we cancelled the wedding and eventually.... we called it "quits".
I was heartbroken and I was angry.
When Michael would come to see our daughter, Taylor, I wouldn't speak to him.
When he took her every other weekend I was sad and I hated him even more.
I really thought that I had despised him with my entire being.
Well, you know what they say... There is a thin line between Love and Hate.
........Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails....Prov 19:21
Hmmmm.... this is a good one. See, MY plan was to hate Michael for all eternity. To carry around that hurt and animosity for as long as I could.
However, the Lord had a purpose.
In the Spring of 1995, Michael asked if he could go to church with us for Easter.
( Now, I give him a great deal of credit here. Anyone who knows me knows that if I don't like you, you know it. I'm not good at pretending)
SO, what could I say?
NO!
That was my initial response.
NO!
Then, it was my Mom who said,,,"You can't tell him that He can't go to church"
SO, begrudgingly, I said "Sure" with a smile pasted to my face. You know that smile, the type with the clenched teeth behind it.
Easter came and we all went to church, the "Happy LIttle Family"
I remember that day vividly, as I sat there, the Lord really began a work in me. I looked over at Michael and I saw him for who he was, I saw a good man who loved his daughter and who I knew loved me....
STILL
For almost 2 years, I held a grudge, I didn't speak to him and I told myself I didn't like him.
And guess what... I was correct... I DIDN"T like him
I LOVED HIM!
Not long after that Easter Service, Michael and I began rebuilding our relationship. This time, we did it the right way. We went to church together and we put God in the center of our life together.
Believe me, It was not all "flowers and butterflies". Sometimes, that grudge I held would rear it's ugly head and I would use the past as a weapon.
Then came a moment I will never forget.... Michael had attended a Promise Keepers Rally with the men from our church. It had changed his life. Changed who he was as a man. and it changed the way that I saw him.
After returning from that convention..Michael stood up in front of the entire church congregation and spilled out his heart... he apologized to me, he stood up there and spoke of his love for God... for me and for our daughters.... in that order.
To make a long story.... well somewhat shorter....
Michael and I were engaged that July and married in December
Exactly 17 yrs ago today
Many people thought that, given our past. we wouldn't make it...but we are going strong and proving them wrong!!
...........Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails....Prov 19:21
My PLAN was to hate Michael forever. The Lord's PURPOSE was to work on our hearts individually, to draw us each unto Him... so that we could then have a relationship with each other that had God in the center... that is the secret to a lasting relationship.
Today, I thank God for the man that He has created for me. Michael is everything that I am not.
I love him more than ever
You may find yourself hating a situation or a person, or dwelling on a circumstance that seems to make no sense. As you can see, I've been there. But in that difficulty, the Lord has a purpose.... sometimes the purpose is to draw you unto Him.. so that HE can begin something new in you.
I will leave you with this, it's one of my favorites:
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose....Romans8:28
Seek Him.
Shelly
ps... I love you Michael
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