THAT STINKIN PIT!!

Have you ever woke up with that stinkin pit in your stomach? You know the one that feels like it's the size of Texas!!! Well, welcome to my morning :(

This past week has been just glorious!! My daughter Taylor was home on Fall Break and we had a week of "doing nothing", which included cuddling in bed, a little shopping and our annual family trip to the Pumpkin Farm. The only problem, it went WAY too quickly!

Taylor is my "middle child". Growing up, Taylor loved to be home, she was never even a fan of sleepovers. Whatever I was doing, she wanted to do. As she grew up, she especially loved being in the kitchen with me. So, when Tay decided to go to Culinary School, I was thrilled. Although the plan was for her to go to school in Chicago (700 miles away), I knew this was perfect for her and I thought "OK God, I gave her to you, if you want her in Chicago, I'll deal" Oh yeah, did I mention that my sister and my aunt and uncle all live in the Chicago area. That made this concession a little easier, I must admit. Although I did have that little pit in my stomach, knowing that she would be so far away.

Shortly after Taylor's acceptance into Culinary School, ( at this point I was getting used to the idea that 700 miles wasn't THAT far from home), she decided she wanted to join our church on a short-term missions trip to Ecuador. Really? This girl never wanted to stay anywhere, Ecuador!! Needless to say, my good friend THE PIT, returned.

Again, I prayed and I informed God ( as if HE didn't already know), that I gave Taylor to Him and he had better protect her because I am one of those mom's that becomes , well let's just say, aggressive, when you mess with my kids. Of course. I was totally neglecting the fact that she was actually HIS child. Sometimes, denial is a very good place to live.

For Taylor, Ecuador was a life-changer. While I was telling God that He had better protect MY girl, HE was telling Taylor that he had a plan for her life, a plan that DID NOT include Culinary School.
Taylor was called to be a missionary, while serving in Ecuador.

Can you say BIG, MAMMOTH,HUGE,STINKIN PIT!!!!!

This was not my plan, at all. C'mon God, really? I conceded to her being in Chicago. Isn't that enough?
I wanted an answer....... I got one......

^... For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope....Jeremiah 29:11

and then He gave me this verse ...

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
    because the Lord has anointed me
    to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
    to proclaim freedom for the captives
    and release from darkness for the prisoners...Isaiah 61:1

Well, Obviously someone had to go out and spread the gospel, but I always thought it should be someone else's kid, not my own!! These words did not really encourage me, it just enlarged that PIT!!

It has been 2yrs since Taylor has received her calling to Missions and I'm doing some better with accepting this call ( maybe a teensy, tiny bit better, I'm working up to the some better level).

She is in her sophomore year at Oral Robert's University,  in Tulsa OK. Remember when I was fretting about her being 700 miles from home, now she's a mere 1300 miles from home. She is a missions major and she has been to Panama and will be doing a 7week trip this next summer.

Taylor is not special ( of course to me she is exceptional) and God is no respecter of persons. If He had a plan for Taylor , I promise you that he has a plan for you. It includes a hope and a future. Be open to the Spirit of God and be open to the opportunities that he brings your way. Had Taylor not gone on that trip to Ecuador, she would have missed the true plan the Lord had for her.

Later today, I am putting Taylor on a plane to head back to school 1300 miles away and I, once again, have THAT STINKIN PIT in my stomach, and I know that she is exactly where she is supposed to be, to fulfill her purpose. My head knows, without a doubt, that all is good. My heart, however ,hurts because of the distance that separates us, and my stomach, well it is just one BIG STINKIN PIT!!!

Trusting Him, (even with my kids)
Shelly

DESIRE....

Now that I have your attention, let me first give you a disclaimer, this is not about Fifty Shades of Grey (which I am one of the 5 people who have not read this series).

I come from a very long line of cooks/bakers. My great-grandmother left recipes behind that we are still trying to decipher. Her "rusks" were the best rolls I have eaten to this day. We have attempted the recipe and we have even managed to make something close to the original, but we're not quite there yet. The recipe calls for a handful of this and a dash of that, not the exact measurements that we need to replicate that delicious perfection.

My grandmother would call me in the morning and by 9:00am she would have dinner made. with homemade bread/rolls and a dessert. When I say dinner, I mean 60 Holupki or 75 meatballs. I used to think, really? what's the rush?  Now, I find myself waking up and getting my dinner started immediately. Apples don't fall far from the tree!

Well, a few years back, my aunt and my sister took on a huge challenge. They compiled all of our family recipes and put them into a cookbook for each of the women in our family. Now, when I say this was a huge challenge, I mean HUGE!!!. The cookbook ended up being a 4" three ring binder filled with our recipes. I use it everyday, it is one of my greatest treasures!!!

Yesterday, as I was pulling it out, yet again, to bake up a family favorite. An envelope caught my eye. Then I remembered, when my sister, Jami gave me this "Labor of Love", she included a letter to me. At the closing of the letter, she included a line that said "my verse for you"......

Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

This really hit me. I really do have the desires of my heart. God is so faithful.
For a long time, I have wanted to take my love of baking, and turn it into a business. I was scared and I had no idea how to do such a thing. It was just this desire I had hidden deep down inside of me.

Then Tara decided that I should take orders for baked goods to help fund Taylor's missions trip to Panama. Sure, I thought, I could make a few things. Well, it proved to be a huge blessing and I was able to provide 50% of Taylor's budget through my baking. Since that time, I have seen this business grow and develop, not at record pace, but slow and steady.

What an epiphany when I found this letter from my sister and I read that verse. He did give me the desires of my heart, and leave it to the Lord to not only give me that, but to orchestrate it in a way that glorifies Him and uses MY talents to further HIS kingdom. What an honor to serve the Lord in this way.

What are the dreams and desires that you have hidden away? They may be hidden from view, but God sees our innermost being. He knows they are there and in His perfect timing and in his perfect way, he will give you those things that you truly desire, just keep living in communion with him, and one day you will realize, He has given you all that you have desired and more!!!

Delighting in Him,
Shelly

Just Imagine....


I bet you were expecting a big purple dinosaur. Anytime I hear "Just Imagine" I think of Barney. Barney and my daughter, Taylor. When Tay was a little 4 yr old in dance class, she hated that song, and I do mean HATED!!! We would play a cassette ( yes we had cassettes back then) of her dance songs and everytime that song came on, she would yell "change it". For whatever reason that song struck a nerve in her.

Seriously though, when you look back, did you imagine that where you are right now, is where you would be?

Did you imagine a life better than the one you are currently living? Did life surpass your expectations?

As I was watching Veggietales with my grandson, they were teaching about our plans vs God's plans for us, and it really got me thinking.

Let me tell you, the life I have now, is not even close to the one that I had imagined for myself. WHen I was a teenager, I had decided that I would graduate High School, move to a big city, and perhaps work in a glamorous industry like fashion, or modeling, I would travel and go to fancy parties and be SOOO happy.

Well, this was God's plan... I fell in love at 16 and found myself pregnant at 17 and gave birth to my daughter, Tara, just 4 months after turning 18. I know what you may be thinking, God didn't plan on you being an unwed mother. Well, I think He did. You see, God used that to save me from myself. From my self-centered, self-indulgent dreams. I never even considered motherhood. That didn't fit into my glamorous life.MY plan was far more exciting than this plan of God's.

Here's what they say " You want to hear God laugh? Tell HIM YOUR plans"

To make a long story short, God used a beautiful, tiny baby girl to show me HE was in control. This young girl that had no interest in children, held that baby girl and I felt my heart fill with love in a way that I had never known. At that very moment, my dreams changed, they were no longer my dreams. they were dreams for my Tara.

I know, without a doubt that I was created to be a Mom, and I know that if it were up to me, I would have missed out on the greatest blessings, my children. I would have been a self-centered. egotistical human being. But, lucky for us, God does more for us than we could ever imagine

 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, Ephesians3:20

I thank God everyday that His plans for me were way bigger than my biggest dreams. 
Don't limit yourself and don't put limits on God, the life He has created you for will far surpass anything you can think or....Just Imagine.

Keep Believing,
Shelly